I just found this unpublished blog sitting in my drafts folder, I thought It was pretty good so I am sharing it now:)
BANG! You hear the gun go off and begin the race to mommyhood. Ok its time, lets do this.
When it comes to "trying to conceive" or ttc for the fertility gurus impatience seems to be THE virtue of every woman with a blaring biological clock alarm. Weeks feel like decades. The days preceding the expected day of doom (First day of your cycle UG) crawl like a dying slug. Over the course of time you pee on countless sticks though you know there is no conceivable way you will get a positive as you only did the deed 6 hours ago. *don't laugh you know you have done this*
Every twinge, every ailment, every dream all seem to point to a possible pregnancy. (for those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about just google pregnancy symptoms)
" Ok so I had a dream last night that I was pregnant, and then I went to the mall and passed a maternity store and the lady by the door handed me a flyer, then after lunch I TOTALLY had to pee and my stomach kind of hurts. I just got off my period and haven't had sex but my boyfriend and I totally made out really hard last week.. could I be pregnant???"
This is only worsened when your heart is aching to be a mommy either again or for the first time.
So what can be done to sooth the gnawing beast of time while you are t.t.c?
I have been interviewing a group of people regarding this matter and this is the list of answers I have come up with in no particular order
ways to preoccupy your mind while waiting for your bfp.
1 Kick the habit *regardless of what it may be anything that is bad for your health is especially bad for you while ttc.
2 change your diet *whole foods are much better for optimal fertility then processed chemicals.
3 kick you booty into high gear fitness wise *Pregnancy is hard on your body, not to mention the marathon that is birth can require an immense amount of stamina. So being physically fit will make this process much easier on you
4 Get your life in order. *Obviously no one is perfect and no ones houses, lives etc are perfect but the less chaos you have in your world (be it physical clutter in your home, cluttered thoughts, unhealthy friendships you know your "demons" and the less there are in your world the more peaceful your world will be for to lower the stress in your life. Stress is awful on the body and affects unborn babies. Babies also have a keen sense of their mommies emotions, so it continues to affect them after they are born as well. Some stress is inevitable but the more stress you can eliminate the better it is overall.
5 Read some books you may think you will have time to read once baby is born and sweetly nursing/sleeping for hours on end but this just isn't the case. Any free moment you have SHOULD be spent sleeping. So any mental prep work you need to do now is the time to do it. You won't have time for parenting books later anyway.
6 Volunteer * Find something you are passionate about and give your time their. Animals? Find a shelter. The elderly? Go visit residents in a nursing home. Babies? Volunteer to work in your churches nursery or sign up for big brother big sister.
7 Babysit * Need practice changing diapers? I promise you there are people with kids BEGGING for sitters. Offer to watch your friend's offspring for an evening while she and her husband go out for dinner.
8 Purge your life This goes along with number 4 but anything in your life that is unhealthy emotionally (ESPECIALLY friendships) Get rid of them. Its hard to do but people affect you far more then you realize. If someone in your life is a drain on you mentally or emotionally take a long hard look at that relationship and weigh if it is worth it.
9 Relationship health *I have heard that marriage can be the closest thing to Heaven and/or the closest thing to Hell here on earth. The same can be said of co parenting. Examine your relationship and determine if you are sure you want to raise children with that person. (I don't care if you have been married 20 years) If your relationship is on the rocks I can promise you kids will NOT make it better. Only worse. Whatever cracks or weak spots a relationship has kids illuminate those areas and make them FAR more apparent. So insure that your relationship is healthy and strong and if its not work on those areas together before adding a baby to the mix
10 Tune your heart into God *Pray, read the bible, build your faith. Trust me you will need it
11 Vitamins/ health regimen This is self explanatory, but health practitioners recommend a vitamin regimen before conceiving since a baby needs a vast majority of its nutrients from the very beginning especially folic acid so make sure you prenatal have the correct amount of Folic Acid in them.
12 Visit the dentist/ ob Get your health in order NOW. Pregnancy makes your teeth get all kind of crazy so take care of any oral health issues you have now. It is encouraged to see an ob before conceiving if possible again to insure any issues are addressed before pregnancy occurs
13 DRINK WATER * water affects SO much in our bodies because we are comprised mostly of water. Most people are chronically dehydrated and though it doesn't sound like a big deal it really is. That dude from the beegees? He died from a fecal impaction caused but dehydration. (I know this cause I suffered from a MUCH milder form of it while pregnant and ended up in the hospital from the pain. Trust me you want to stay nice and hydrated. It also reduces your risk for vaginal tearing, stretch marks wrinkles and a host of other health issues. DRINK YOUR WATER
14 Plan a big event (vacation, party, etc) babies usually come when you are least
expecting them this is almost a sure fire way to get pregnant;)
15 TCOYF!!! Read the book Taking charge of your fertility. TRUST me. If you are female you should read this book. It will change your life.
16 Bucket list Start marking off things on your bucket list. No matter how small just do it!It will certainly make the time go by faster:)
17 Hang out with friends Go on dates, see movies, go to an amusement park, have a game night and drink a glass of wine. Whatever you enjoy doing, now is the time to do it. Cause it is possible that once you are pregnant you wont feel up to it
18 And of course the big one: HAVE LOTS OF SEX :) (thats the fun part) but DON'T get into the trap a lot of people fall into and that is to make it mechanical and cold. Nothing is more unsexy then taking your temp checking your cervical mucus and penciling in your "O" date. But it doesn't have to become a business arrangement or science experiment. Make it fun. Try new things, get creative:)
This is obviously not an exhaustive list simply the things those who have gone before me have shared:) What do you recommend?
Monday, December 2, 2013
my yearly update
My what a difference a year can make:) You know how I said a couple posts ago that one day I would get better at posting? You don't? Possibly because that post was written like a year ago but hey who's counting?
In my last entry I poured out my heart describing how deeply my heart yearned for a baby. Little did I know that almost exactly a month later God would answer that prayer:)
On November 1st the Hubster and I officially began "trying" for baby number 2.
On December 1st (a year ago yesterday) I took a test. It was positive.
I knew before I knew really because I had every symptom I had ever read including leaking boobies. (I did mention before I was over sharing right?:)) I hadn't nursed in well over a year so this was abnormal to say the least.
I went to church that day and sang in the praise team and had the biggest grin on my face no one knew but Andrew and we decided to wait to announce it till Christmas day.
This is how we did it
First I told my parents ( I will write about that in my next post)
Then Christmas morning we got on Skype with Andrew's family and I had Hailey in a shirt I made that said "big sister" I told them Hailey wanted to show them what she got for Christmas and had her get up closer to the camera so they could see her shirt:) After that and a few select phone calls we announced it to the world by posting this picture on facebook
along with a clever little poem that went something like
"Better then packages ribbons and bows are ten little fingers and ten little toes..."
It's so weird knowing that this was a little less then a year ago. It feels like it just happened and yet I feel like she has always been a part of my life. I am so smitten with my sweet little lady. :)
My pregnancy was pretty hard. Again I will get into that in another post but the birth couldn't have been more amazing. And now the happiest little girl on the planet has taken a very predominant place in my heart and life.
Skylar Nicole Cuevas was born on August 20 2013. She weighed 8.03 lbs and was 20 1/4 inches long. It was a water birth at home and she was born in the caul.
I will write out my birth story and share pics from my pregnancy next but at least I got this thing "SOMEWHAT updated;)"
Now I am going to attempt to sleep... ha
In my last entry I poured out my heart describing how deeply my heart yearned for a baby. Little did I know that almost exactly a month later God would answer that prayer:)
On November 1st the Hubster and I officially began "trying" for baby number 2.
On December 1st (a year ago yesterday) I took a test. It was positive.
I knew before I knew really because I had every symptom I had ever read including leaking boobies. (I did mention before I was over sharing right?:)) I hadn't nursed in well over a year so this was abnormal to say the least.
I went to church that day and sang in the praise team and had the biggest grin on my face no one knew but Andrew and we decided to wait to announce it till Christmas day.
This is how we did it
First I told my parents ( I will write about that in my next post)
Then Christmas morning we got on Skype with Andrew's family and I had Hailey in a shirt I made that said "big sister" I told them Hailey wanted to show them what she got for Christmas and had her get up closer to the camera so they could see her shirt:) After that and a few select phone calls we announced it to the world by posting this picture on facebook
along with a clever little poem that went something like
"Better then packages ribbons and bows are ten little fingers and ten little toes..."
It's so weird knowing that this was a little less then a year ago. It feels like it just happened and yet I feel like she has always been a part of my life. I am so smitten with my sweet little lady. :)
My pregnancy was pretty hard. Again I will get into that in another post but the birth couldn't have been more amazing. And now the happiest little girl on the planet has taken a very predominant place in my heart and life.
Skylar Nicole Cuevas was born on August 20 2013. She weighed 8.03 lbs and was 20 1/4 inches long. It was a water birth at home and she was born in the caul.
I will write out my birth story and share pics from my pregnancy next but at least I got this thing "SOMEWHAT updated;)"
Now I am going to attempt to sleep... ha
Sunday, October 21, 2012
loss and blessing
The clock has begun ticking...
You know the one. Where EVERYTHING you read, watch, talk about and dream about begins to be filled with babies. Cute helpless wrinkly little lovebugs that just seem to stare into your soul and beg the question, "so... ? Anything yet? "
Your friends nonchalantly bring it up and all you can say is "heh some day" while in your head secretly your saying "Goodnight do I hope its this month"
I have NO idea how long it will take because my sweet bug was a total surprise. The hubster and I were fully intending on waiting till thirty hit before we were going to TALK about procreating. But God had another idea. So the first day of my second semester in cosmetology school I realized I was way overdue for my period went home after school took a test and bam. BABY :)
The first time I was pregnant was unplanned as well. It was unexpected and not optimal timing to say the least, but the hubster and I were coming to grips with it and actually quite excited. We began planning and preparing as all young parents to be do, discussing names, birth plans etc, and then one horrible night I began cramping and bleeding. A lot. I will spare you all the gory details but it was awful And to make matters worse my dear sweet man was not in town at the time so I had to face this alone. I rushed to the E.R. hoping there was something they could do but they confirmed my worst fear. I was miscarrying and there was nothing that could be done. I lay on a gurney in a hallway feeling my body laboring and my tiny little one slipping away. It was horrific and one of the worst senses of loss I could imagine.
I hadn't told many people I was pregnant in the first place and since it was so early on I felt weird bringing it up, and some of those who did know made me feel like I didn't have a reason to mourn my baby.
But I know that though I never got to hold my dear little one he or she is in Heaven running around playing on those streets of gold and one day I will get to meet that sweet child.
Following this I had a dr apt where the Dr basically told me I had endometriosis and would likely struggle to conceive and have difficulty carrying to full term. It could be a long road.
We did our best to heal and move on and poured ourselves into one another and put the thought of parenthood aside. But deep in my heart I have longed to be a mommy longer then I can remember.
When I was young I never hung out with kids my age at church I was always in the nursery holding babies, or in the foyer playing with kids. I intentionally sat at the kids table and was a nanny/ teacher for years because kids were my passion.
So the day I was at cosmetology school and three women who were in my class out of the blue began laying hands on my belly and praying God would heal my uterus. I did not tell these women the aforementioned story, they did not know my reproductive issues, but they prayed anyway and it was one of the most intense prayer sessions I have ever been a part of. I felt God's presence in that college bathroom.
Shortly thereafter I found out I was pregnant with my lady bug. It truly was a miracle, but the miracle more then that was at one point in the pregnancy I began having similar symptoms that I had during the miscarriage. My midwife was even concerned based on those symptoms that that might be the case. I stood in the shower holding onto the hubster for support sobbing and crying out for our tiny baby.
But as you well know God heard my cry and she is a strong healthy precocious two year old :)
Fast forward to a couple days ago, I was at McDonalds and a sweet older Hispanic woman walked up to me and grabbed my hand and began speaking to me in Spanish saying among other things I didn't quite understand, that she would pray for me every day to have a baby boy and a baby girl.
It struck me as odd until I remembered what happened with Hailey and that got me thinking,
I have the tendency to try to take things in my own hands. I am a planner and a schemer and sometimes try to push things so that they happen in my time frame, and I have been tempted to get ahead of myself with the whole baby thing, but you know what? God's timing is so much better then mine. It is perfect. He is so far beyond wise, He IS wisdom. He knows the future and He knows my heart and what I need.
This process could take months or years or it might not be His will that I even have another.
Do I want one? Absofreakinglutely. Will I get impatient? Probably.
But I must remind myself it is God and God alone that opens and closes the womb.
I will do my part and prepare and.. you know other things, but it is ultimately God's choice as to when and even if that happens.
I need to stop and remind myself of that.
I have been compiling a list of ways to preoccupy myself in the meantime. I will post it next. Until we meet again meditate on this truth;
You know the one. Where EVERYTHING you read, watch, talk about and dream about begins to be filled with babies. Cute helpless wrinkly little lovebugs that just seem to stare into your soul and beg the question, "so... ? Anything yet? "
Your friends nonchalantly bring it up and all you can say is "heh some day" while in your head secretly your saying "Goodnight do I hope its this month"
I have NO idea how long it will take because my sweet bug was a total surprise. The hubster and I were fully intending on waiting till thirty hit before we were going to TALK about procreating. But God had another idea. So the first day of my second semester in cosmetology school I realized I was way overdue for my period went home after school took a test and bam. BABY :)
The first time I was pregnant was unplanned as well. It was unexpected and not optimal timing to say the least, but the hubster and I were coming to grips with it and actually quite excited. We began planning and preparing as all young parents to be do, discussing names, birth plans etc, and then one horrible night I began cramping and bleeding. A lot. I will spare you all the gory details but it was awful And to make matters worse my dear sweet man was not in town at the time so I had to face this alone. I rushed to the E.R. hoping there was something they could do but they confirmed my worst fear. I was miscarrying and there was nothing that could be done. I lay on a gurney in a hallway feeling my body laboring and my tiny little one slipping away. It was horrific and one of the worst senses of loss I could imagine.
I hadn't told many people I was pregnant in the first place and since it was so early on I felt weird bringing it up, and some of those who did know made me feel like I didn't have a reason to mourn my baby.
But I know that though I never got to hold my dear little one he or she is in Heaven running around playing on those streets of gold and one day I will get to meet that sweet child.
Following this I had a dr apt where the Dr basically told me I had endometriosis and would likely struggle to conceive and have difficulty carrying to full term. It could be a long road.
We did our best to heal and move on and poured ourselves into one another and put the thought of parenthood aside. But deep in my heart I have longed to be a mommy longer then I can remember.
When I was young I never hung out with kids my age at church I was always in the nursery holding babies, or in the foyer playing with kids. I intentionally sat at the kids table and was a nanny/ teacher for years because kids were my passion.
So the day I was at cosmetology school and three women who were in my class out of the blue began laying hands on my belly and praying God would heal my uterus. I did not tell these women the aforementioned story, they did not know my reproductive issues, but they prayed anyway and it was one of the most intense prayer sessions I have ever been a part of. I felt God's presence in that college bathroom.
Shortly thereafter I found out I was pregnant with my lady bug. It truly was a miracle, but the miracle more then that was at one point in the pregnancy I began having similar symptoms that I had during the miscarriage. My midwife was even concerned based on those symptoms that that might be the case. I stood in the shower holding onto the hubster for support sobbing and crying out for our tiny baby.
But as you well know God heard my cry and she is a strong healthy precocious two year old :)
Fast forward to a couple days ago, I was at McDonalds and a sweet older Hispanic woman walked up to me and grabbed my hand and began speaking to me in Spanish saying among other things I didn't quite understand, that she would pray for me every day to have a baby boy and a baby girl.
It struck me as odd until I remembered what happened with Hailey and that got me thinking,
I have the tendency to try to take things in my own hands. I am a planner and a schemer and sometimes try to push things so that they happen in my time frame, and I have been tempted to get ahead of myself with the whole baby thing, but you know what? God's timing is so much better then mine. It is perfect. He is so far beyond wise, He IS wisdom. He knows the future and He knows my heart and what I need.
This process could take months or years or it might not be His will that I even have another.
Do I want one? Absofreakinglutely. Will I get impatient? Probably.
But I must remind myself it is God and God alone that opens and closes the womb.
I will do my part and prepare and.. you know other things, but it is ultimately God's choice as to when and even if that happens.
I need to stop and remind myself of that.
I have been compiling a list of ways to preoccupy myself in the meantime. I will post it next. Until we meet again meditate on this truth;
Jeremiah 29:11
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
Monday, October 8, 2012
Crafty organization
I am sure you have heard of the concept of the left brain vs the right brain, if you haven't here is a table describing the differences.
| Right Brain Inventory | Left Brain Inventory |
| • Visual, focusing on images, patterns | • Verbal, focusing on words, symbols, numbers |
| • Intuitive, led by feelings | • Analytical, led by logic |
| • Process ideas simultaneously | • Process ideas sequentially, step by step |
| • 'Mind photos' used to remember things, writing things down or illustrating them helps you remember | • Words used to remember things, remember names rather than faces |
| • Make lateral connections from information | • Make logical deductions from information |
| • See the whole first, then the details | • Work up to the whole step by step, focusing on details, information organized |
| • Organization ends to be lacking | • Highly organized |
| • Free association | • Like making lists and planning |
| • Like to know why you're doing something or why rules exist (reasons) | • Likely to follow rules without questioning them |
| • No sense of time | • Good at keeping track of time |
| • May have trouble with spelling and finding words to express yourself | • Spelling and mathematical formula easily memorized |
| • Enjoy touching and feeling actual objects (sensory input) | • Enjoy observing |
| • Trouble prioritizing, so often late, impulsive | • Plan ahead |
| • Unlikely to read instruction manual before trying | • Likely read an instruction manual before trying |
| • Listen to how something is being said | • Listen to what is being said |
| • Talk with your hands | • Rarely use gestures when talking |
| • Likely to think you're naturally creative, but need to apply yourself to develop your potential | • Likely to believe you're not creative, need to be willing to try and take risks to develop your potential |
Anyone who has known me for any period of time whatsoever will know that I live almost exclusively on the right side of my brain. I am extremely creative, and LOVE to do things that allow me to express myself. And one of my vises is crafting. I love it so much that my "media" is varied. I love to scrap book and draw, paint and write, I love making jewelry and hair bows, and my new found addiction is making baked goods.
Here are pictures of some cookies and cupcakes I made recently;
I used royal icing for the top. It's a process that is extremely time consuming but so worth the outcome because it is super cute:)
These are marshmallow fondant lady bugs and flower cupcake toppers.
The cookies are royal icing
So as you can see, I LOVE to craft:) It's my passion. If I had unlimited time and resources my house would be a freaking hobby lobby.
Here's my problem, one of the major characteristics of the right side of the brain is lack of organization. Which anyone who has ever been to my house can attest, it's most definitely not my strong suit.
I want SO desperately to be hard core organized. It is almost an obsession of mine. I LOVE organization books, I am attracted to people who's homes are immaculate. I crave order and organization because it is my weakness. Because I lack it in a deep way.
When I see pictures like this
I salivate.
I want to have a space like that in the worst way. SIGH
One day I will become organized. I hope... in the mean time, I take it one day at a time. So when you see pictures of adorable creations from artistic people and feel a tinge of jealousy for their artistic talents, just remember most artists are tortured... if by nothing else then clutter. Clutter of the home and clutter of the brain.
But truth be told if my fairy godmother came to me and offered me the ability to get and keep my world in perfect order in exchange for my creative artistic messy brain being taken away I would never take the deal.
I like my cluttered artsy messy self. Now to craft something...
Friday, October 5, 2012
one day
One day I will finally learn and stop creating blogs only to forget to write in them or forget the login info..
(yeah, right)
I debated doing this because what I am about to do is considered tacky or distasteful to talk about. After all the following subject is private. It should only be discussed between spouses and with ones health practitioner and perhaps close friends over cocktails like in sex and the city, but I have never been one to be private. I like to over share so I am doing that here.
I am hardcore ready to procreate. Yep you read that right. Baby fever is in full swing at my house.
"But how can this be?? According to your latest entries your offspring is like six weeks old!" (yells my nonexistent reader)
That brings us to the opening thought. You see I started this blog with excellent intentions and then motherhood hit. My tiny tiny little peanut that at birth had the head of the alien from alien,
is now a gorgeous vivacious flaxen haired diva with opinions on her shoes, clothes and how (or if) I will style her hair.
She loves to dance, is obsessed with Dora the explorer (shoot me now), and is exceptionally helpful when it comes to taste testing any candy, sweet beverages or really anything sweet that enters this house. She is shy at first with strangers but once she gets to know someone she remembers their names and follows them around the house saying their name in a loop. (grin)
I love this child more then there are words to type. So much so that I only lasted about two months at an attempt at working because I just couldn't be away from her that long. She is so much like her daddy from her appearance (minus the blonde hair) to her personality (did I mention she is opinionated?)
But every once in a while I see glimpses of me in her. (Like her love for performing for an audience)
Parenting is awesome but very time consuming so although I had great intentions I lost all track of blogging. But I have an inspiration for writing and a little more time to do so now that my lady bug actually likes to play by herself sometimes.
So where were we? Oh yes the baby bug. I started a blog and it was going to be an anonymous blog all about becoming healthy and trying to conceive, pregnancy, labor, birth, breast feeding and parenting all as naturally as possible. But then I didn't blog for a while and completely forgot my log in.(someone please tell me I'm not the only one who does this) I remember the name of the blog but can't for the life of me remember the email account I created and linked it to so.. oh well. There are plenty of other blogs that talk about all that anyway so I decided instead of anonymously sharing my opinions I will do it publicly!! Woohoo!!
Those who know me know I am a freak anyway. At least when it comes to the medical world.
Why is that you ask? I have this strange notion that our bodies are fantastic things that (though not always) most of us when allowed to do what they were created to do can deliver babies without a myriad of drugs, interventions and other things that are actually REALLY bad for the woman delivering and the baby being delivered.
Watch movies like "birth in america" or The business of being born" and you will see what I am talking about.
http://www.thebusinessofbeingborn.com/
I also have decided not to vaccinate my child. I have gotten a LOT of flack for this but the more research I do the further I am convinced I have made the right choice. And she is super healthy btw.
http://vaxtruth.org/
When sick if there is a natural remedy for that ailment I will seek it out vs putting horrible chemicals that drug companies bribe Dr.s to prescribe who's list of side effects are often far worse then the ailment they are "curing"
Now before I am inundated with hate mail let me preface all that by saying this. Not every person is the same, and there certainly are situations either in childbirth or in typical health care emergencies when Dr.s care surgery and medications certainly are necessary but my belief is that there are a lot of people being unnecessarily medicated hospitalized and even receiving surgery when a much lesser remedy would have done the job. I have seen far too many of my friends and family have unnecessary procedures, including c sections that could have been avoided had the Dr. been more concerned for that patient then lining their own pockets.
I digress:
I will update further on life up till now later, but I was struck with this thought;
It's a pretty cruel joke when you go from being a young person first embarking on certain physical activities (wink wink nod nod) and fretting, sweating, praying hoping preventing so as not to have an ill timed childling. Heck mine was a surprise. (New Years eve baby) But we were old enough and married so it wasn't a bad surprise. So to go from the freaking out you do as a young adult trying desperately not to conceive to an older adult fully ready to do so and several months of trying and timing and eventually taking temperatures and checking cervical mucus (ew btw who named that? Could a term BE more disgusting??) and reading books and peeing on sticks only to realize that the ample fertility you were burdened with less then a decade earlier has slipped away and now that you are emotionally and financially prepared to embark on parenting its a whole heck of a lot harder to achieve then you thought. What the heck is wrong with that?? Why can't the older ladies who's fully capable loving arms ache for a baby have one? Why is it that these young girls who were babies a little over a decade before that look at a boy and get pregnant? It doesn't make sense but then I guess that's why in the bible times people got married at the age of 12. Can you imagine marrying someone when you were 12 and then proceeding to live till you are 200 or something like that? What is the customary gift for ones 100th wedding anniversary?
Ok enough rambling thoughts for now I'm starting to get loopy..
next year I will update on life up to this point;)
(yeah, right)
I debated doing this because what I am about to do is considered tacky or distasteful to talk about. After all the following subject is private. It should only be discussed between spouses and with ones health practitioner and perhaps close friends over cocktails like in sex and the city, but I have never been one to be private. I like to over share so I am doing that here.
I am hardcore ready to procreate. Yep you read that right. Baby fever is in full swing at my house.
"But how can this be?? According to your latest entries your offspring is like six weeks old!" (yells my nonexistent reader)
That brings us to the opening thought. You see I started this blog with excellent intentions and then motherhood hit. My tiny tiny little peanut that at birth had the head of the alien from alien,
is now a gorgeous vivacious flaxen haired diva with opinions on her shoes, clothes and how (or if) I will style her hair.
She loves to dance, is obsessed with Dora the explorer (shoot me now), and is exceptionally helpful when it comes to taste testing any candy, sweet beverages or really anything sweet that enters this house. She is shy at first with strangers but once she gets to know someone she remembers their names and follows them around the house saying their name in a loop. (grin)
I love this child more then there are words to type. So much so that I only lasted about two months at an attempt at working because I just couldn't be away from her that long. She is so much like her daddy from her appearance (minus the blonde hair) to her personality (did I mention she is opinionated?)
But every once in a while I see glimpses of me in her. (Like her love for performing for an audience)
Parenting is awesome but very time consuming so although I had great intentions I lost all track of blogging. But I have an inspiration for writing and a little more time to do so now that my lady bug actually likes to play by herself sometimes.
So where were we? Oh yes the baby bug. I started a blog and it was going to be an anonymous blog all about becoming healthy and trying to conceive, pregnancy, labor, birth, breast feeding and parenting all as naturally as possible. But then I didn't blog for a while and completely forgot my log in.(someone please tell me I'm not the only one who does this) I remember the name of the blog but can't for the life of me remember the email account I created and linked it to so.. oh well. There are plenty of other blogs that talk about all that anyway so I decided instead of anonymously sharing my opinions I will do it publicly!! Woohoo!!
Those who know me know I am a freak anyway. At least when it comes to the medical world.
Why is that you ask? I have this strange notion that our bodies are fantastic things that (though not always) most of us when allowed to do what they were created to do can deliver babies without a myriad of drugs, interventions and other things that are actually REALLY bad for the woman delivering and the baby being delivered.
Watch movies like "birth in america" or The business of being born" and you will see what I am talking about.
http://www.thebusinessofbeingborn.com/
I also have decided not to vaccinate my child. I have gotten a LOT of flack for this but the more research I do the further I am convinced I have made the right choice. And she is super healthy btw.
http://vaxtruth.org/
When sick if there is a natural remedy for that ailment I will seek it out vs putting horrible chemicals that drug companies bribe Dr.s to prescribe who's list of side effects are often far worse then the ailment they are "curing"
Now before I am inundated with hate mail let me preface all that by saying this. Not every person is the same, and there certainly are situations either in childbirth or in typical health care emergencies when Dr.s care surgery and medications certainly are necessary but my belief is that there are a lot of people being unnecessarily medicated hospitalized and even receiving surgery when a much lesser remedy would have done the job. I have seen far too many of my friends and family have unnecessary procedures, including c sections that could have been avoided had the Dr. been more concerned for that patient then lining their own pockets.
I digress:
I will update further on life up till now later, but I was struck with this thought;
It's a pretty cruel joke when you go from being a young person first embarking on certain physical activities (wink wink nod nod) and fretting, sweating, praying hoping preventing so as not to have an ill timed childling. Heck mine was a surprise. (New Years eve baby) But we were old enough and married so it wasn't a bad surprise. So to go from the freaking out you do as a young adult trying desperately not to conceive to an older adult fully ready to do so and several months of trying and timing and eventually taking temperatures and checking cervical mucus (ew btw who named that? Could a term BE more disgusting??) and reading books and peeing on sticks only to realize that the ample fertility you were burdened with less then a decade earlier has slipped away and now that you are emotionally and financially prepared to embark on parenting its a whole heck of a lot harder to achieve then you thought. What the heck is wrong with that?? Why can't the older ladies who's fully capable loving arms ache for a baby have one? Why is it that these young girls who were babies a little over a decade before that look at a boy and get pregnant? It doesn't make sense but then I guess that's why in the bible times people got married at the age of 12. Can you imagine marrying someone when you were 12 and then proceeding to live till you are 200 or something like that? What is the customary gift for ones 100th wedding anniversary?
Ok enough rambling thoughts for now I'm starting to get loopy..
next year I will update on life up to this point;)
Thursday, September 27, 2012
Monday, June 27, 2011
Have I told you lately that I love you?
I have a big sister. (well physically she is smaller than me but she is older) her name is Kat and this is her blog http://joseandkat.blogspot.com/
She is a missionary to Peru and mother to my two favorite little boys in the whole entire world!! I will admit, I didn't like it when she first told me that she was moving to Peru. It made me cry that I couldn't just stop by bring her a sonic coke and hang with her for hours while the boys brought me all of their toys and showed off their karate skills. Even now while typing this I am tearing up because my only sister couldn't be there when I had my first baby. (I had always wanted her there to hold my leg like I held hers for Logan's birth, payback or something:))
I am sad that I don't get to be there to watch my teddy bears open their presents on there ever increasing birthdays. They aren't my little babies anymore, they are "medium boys" who read and spell and get embarrassed around girls.
I will admit it though, I didn't like it when she got married, I love my bro in law, he is an amazing guy who loves his family and was an excellent choice, but at that point in my mind, he was taking away my sister from me. No more late night giggle fests or random trips to the mall together, she was married now and wouldn't have time for her little sister any more.
Like the time she went to Russia, I cried when she left and for the first few weeks, almost every night.
And the time before that when she was in Dallas for two months, I was beside myself when we were driving home from dropping her off.
And the week she was gone when I was 12, I slept in her room the whole week cause I didn't want her gone. But you get the point. Were we always best friends? No. Did we used to fight? Like cats and dogs. I was the annoying little sister that got in the way and used her clothes without asking. She was the big sister that was too cool for me and just wanted to play with her friends without me tagging along.
I'll never forget the day when she came up to me and asked my forgiveness for not being more nice to me we were just kids but she hugged me tight and we cried together for what felt like an hour. From that point on we told each other everything. She was the one person I could go to about everything.
Sometimes I wish I could just walk into her room sit on her bed and talk over my day with her. I wish I could just call her up and meet up at Mcdonalds and talk about everything and nothing while our kids play together on the play place. But I can't. Because she is thousands of miles away.
Changing the world.
If you haven't figured it out yet, I look up to my sister. I admire her deeply and love her so so much. She serves the Lord whole-heartedly and sacrificially. She has willingly given away everything she had to go pick up her cross and follow Christ in His calling for her life. She is wildly creative, very intelligent, an amazing mother and wonderful wife.
Selfishly, I miss my sister. I wish she were here to walk through life as grown ups together, but in my heart I know that she is right where she needs to be. Helping the people of Peru who need her more than I do. I love my big sister and pray I get to have her back here with me some day but in the mean time I pray for her and am comforted in knowing that my big sissy who changed my world is out there changing THE world. I love you Kathryn Lopez. You are amazing.
She is a missionary to Peru and mother to my two favorite little boys in the whole entire world!! I will admit, I didn't like it when she first told me that she was moving to Peru. It made me cry that I couldn't just stop by bring her a sonic coke and hang with her for hours while the boys brought me all of their toys and showed off their karate skills. Even now while typing this I am tearing up because my only sister couldn't be there when I had my first baby. (I had always wanted her there to hold my leg like I held hers for Logan's birth, payback or something:))
I am sad that I don't get to be there to watch my teddy bears open their presents on there ever increasing birthdays. They aren't my little babies anymore, they are "medium boys" who read and spell and get embarrassed around girls.
I will admit it though, I didn't like it when she got married, I love my bro in law, he is an amazing guy who loves his family and was an excellent choice, but at that point in my mind, he was taking away my sister from me. No more late night giggle fests or random trips to the mall together, she was married now and wouldn't have time for her little sister any more.
Like the time she went to Russia, I cried when she left and for the first few weeks, almost every night.
And the time before that when she was in Dallas for two months, I was beside myself when we were driving home from dropping her off.
And the week she was gone when I was 12, I slept in her room the whole week cause I didn't want her gone. But you get the point. Were we always best friends? No. Did we used to fight? Like cats and dogs. I was the annoying little sister that got in the way and used her clothes without asking. She was the big sister that was too cool for me and just wanted to play with her friends without me tagging along.
I'll never forget the day when she came up to me and asked my forgiveness for not being more nice to me we were just kids but she hugged me tight and we cried together for what felt like an hour. From that point on we told each other everything. She was the one person I could go to about everything.
Sometimes I wish I could just walk into her room sit on her bed and talk over my day with her. I wish I could just call her up and meet up at Mcdonalds and talk about everything and nothing while our kids play together on the play place. But I can't. Because she is thousands of miles away.
Changing the world.
If you haven't figured it out yet, I look up to my sister. I admire her deeply and love her so so much. She serves the Lord whole-heartedly and sacrificially. She has willingly given away everything she had to go pick up her cross and follow Christ in His calling for her life. She is wildly creative, very intelligent, an amazing mother and wonderful wife.
Selfishly, I miss my sister. I wish she were here to walk through life as grown ups together, but in my heart I know that she is right where she needs to be. Helping the people of Peru who need her more than I do. I love my big sister and pray I get to have her back here with me some day but in the mean time I pray for her and am comforted in knowing that my big sissy who changed my world is out there changing THE world. I love you Kathryn Lopez. You are amazing.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)